Thirteen years ago, I stood in our living room at 100 Sherman Ave S, looking into Larry’s eyes, surrounded by a circle of our friends and made a vow to love, honour, care for and respect him until death separated us.
As I said these vows, my left hand was bound to Larry’s right hand with a cord to symbolize the joining of our two lives together. The first action we performed together was to jump over a broom.
I realized last night that I lied in those vows because I STILL love him, honour his memory, care for his happiness and respect the man he was and role he filled in my life. I will carry these feelings with me until the day I leave this land and suspect they will carry me into whatever may lie beyond.
I still have that cord as a reminder of those vows and what they represent to me, I will keep this cord until the day I die. It WILL be with me when I am cremated.
Much as we spent that day 13 years ago surrounded by friends, I spent yesterday surrounded by friends as well – reminiscing about our times together and how we will move forward as friends and honouring Larry’s work and memories – through his Wiccan studies, legacy and extensive library and continuing Santa Canada’s work.
These thoughts came to me as I lay in the living room listening to the music we danced to that night – Mary Chapin Carpenter’s “Grow Old With Me” and Damian Wilson’s “When I Leave This Land.”
I realized last night that perhaps one day I may even add another cord or similar symbol to go along with it. Who knows what fate and the heart have in store?
On this day, I reflect on the time Larry and I had together and how lucky I was – and still am. Happy anniversary hon – I love you! Those promises I made to you those years ago still stand and always will – until I , myself, leave this land.