Hi Hon, Merry Christmas!
I think I’ve done it! I’ve pretty much managed to get through my first holiday season on my own. It’s been tough for me but I’m managing to perservere.
I’ve put a small tree up but have not had the stomach or heart to go through our ornaments yet. Mom and Dad gave me some glass ornaments from my childhood and I have used them as well as the ornament we bought together last year. A local artisan, JB Styles has made some custom ornaments for me too that I will hang with pride for years on OUR tree. I also hung the lit wreath and the two small trees outside so I have done SOME decorating, I just haven’t had “it” in me to go further.
The toughest part of this year so far has been that I wasn’t able to see Mom, Dad, Stephen, Dana and the kids before they travelled this year, the winter storm pretty much put a stop to that – heck there still isn’t power in Mom and Dad’s section of Ajax…I offered to have them stay with me but they said no. It’s tough not having my family around at Christmas, while I’m surrounded by folks who genuinely love and care for me, I have never felt so alone.
I’m going for dinner at the Mandarin with the Prime Timers tomorrow if I’m feeling human. You always enjoyed our Christmas dinners at Mandarin, so I will try to have some Singapore Noodles in your honour.
Sunny and Chloe are doing okay, Chloe especially, although Sunny is showing the signs of his age, he’s getting thinner and slower and doing a lot of lying down. I suspect he will be joining you and Tia soon – I only hope he falls asleep and never wakes up. Aaron is looking after them during the day, when he’s healthy, however he has been diagnosed with diabetes and also lymphoma (yup – cancer) due to the medications they have him on. So it’s been a continued tough go for him, Jeff and Michele and they need whatever love and support we can give them.
I’ve managed to keep myself busy with music this year, the CD release went really well and we’ve sold a bunch of copies. It’s even moreso special that you are our cover boy for this one and when friends recognize you and comment, it really makes me happy. David has been up twice and we managed to do a set in each of the Gay Men’s Chorus’ shows…
The Gay Men’s Chorus shows went really well and the Christmas concerts this year were dedicated in your memory – the boys managed to play keep away with the program from me until late on the second show – I teared up massively when I saw it.
As we were preparing to hit the stage for the St. Catharines show, Drake Jensen messaged me with the press release for his version of Here Comes Santa Claus as he and Michael are donating the profit from the song to Santa Canada in your name. Cue massive water works.
Church has been good for me, both singing at St. Paul’s and becoming a member of Laidlaw Memorial. While I still take issue with a good chunk of Christian doctrine and the abuses I’ve suffered in the past due to organized religion, I have found support, love and solace with both members of the St. Paul’s choir AND in Rev. Doug and the congregation at Laidlaw.
Jeff and Leslie are incredible as always and we’ve been working together in the way you hoped we would. We’ve been good for one another and they are continuing to learn from your life’s work and teachings. Your white robes were worn at Yule this year and they made a lovely addition to the evening. Jeff looked so regal in them.
Santas Bob (Boyter and Garvin) have been so incredible and supportive, I’m enjoying working with them on continuing to grow Santa Canada and they are also helping me come to terms with surviving the season. I got to visit Bob Boyter at the “office” and realized that you’d be so happy with the log cabin they built for storytime with Santa, I wish you could have seen it – it’s truly magical! Speaking of Santas, your various suits and boots are continuing spreading the joy and love of the season with the various Santas wearing them. There may even be two new real bearded Santas next year in David and Hal…you continue to work your magic!
It’s so funny that it’s the little things I miss, the kiss and hug when I get home from work, holding your hand when we watch TV, the look of anticipation on your face when Cindy or Anne delivered your waffles to you at the Cannon…
Merry Christmas hon, I miss you so much.